Annoyances

I came across this Metafilter entry and immediately understood the genius behind his post. I pulled down some of my issues of ReadyMade and began flipping through the profiles.

Mattholomew is right on. There was always something that bothered me about this magazine (and the majority of indie food/craft/DIY blogs out there), and I just never figured out what it is until now. All of the profiles are of people whose lives are just SO interesting and every minute is a whirlwind of free-spirited eccentricity. They all have a tiny, playful smirk as they show off their 900 sq. foot studio in Manhattan or their giant, bio-diverse log cabin with vaulted ceilings and large oak tables hewn by Hemingway's cousin-in-law. High end designer furniture is arranged with the eye of an interior decorator, but there's always a collection of something oddball: "I collect potsherds, found soda bottles, marbles, bones, shells, rocks, beads, hand spindles, and fiber/yarn...in other words, I'm a landlocked beachcomber!" Oh, aren't you just?

I always wondered how the woman who hand prints t-shirts with homemade dye that she squeezes from various produce and her husband who repairs ukeleles have either the time or the money to flit about town to all the hotspots.
I won't lie, when I first came across this magazine and these blogs, I absolutely wanted to be these people (I want to churn my own butter using a wooden churner I found in an alley in Soho and then restored myself!), and then fretted when my life just didn't seem to be able to go in that direction. Why can't I quit my office job to write a recipe book and travel about the world meeting other bloggers who on a whim open up their own wildly successful organic bakery? Because it's unrealistic and I imagine the constant striving to find a new, innovative recipe for kale and quinoa is exhausting. It reminds me of the Mr. Show sketch where David keeps getting more and more unique animals until he finally get his very own Albino and exclaims "you're so different...I'M so different!!"

So, essentially: STFU ReadyMade (still love your projects, though) and ApartmentTherapy, and all the other magazines that flaunt this Bohemian lifestyle that only trust fund babies could afford. I like making my own yogurt, and I enjoy growing organic rosemary, but I also really enjoy sitting around in flannel pants I got from Target, playing GTA4 and eating Kraft Macaroni and Cheese (without an ounce of artisanal asiago flaked on top).